Half Arsed Summary of our Caravanning Adventures in 2019

2019 was a bit of a year for us. A quick summary would read 9 trips staying 61 nights away on 10 different sites (6 of which were new to us) and 2350 towing miles miles in two different caravans.

The year started early for us at the start of February, when full of post Christmas winter blues, Herself suggested a cheeky 4 nights away.  In freezing temperatures and surrounded by snow we spent 4 nights at Tudor Caravan Park in Gloucester shire.  We didn't know it at the time, but this was to be our last trip out in our cherished Pageant 7 Series Sancerre.  Short days were spent walking along the towpath of the adjacent ship canal and getting shitfaced in the Tudor Arms adjoining the site.

We'd been to the big show at the NEC in October and for varying reasons, mainly money, that we would not change the van just yet.  Just 4 days after returning from Tudor an advert flashed up on my time line from the local dealer.  We went to have a look and to cut a long story short fell for an offer that was too good to miss.

February 23rd saw us collecting the Charisma 635, but there was no way we were going to wait until Easter to try it out, so late on March 7th, in the darkness once more, we are pulling through the gates once more of Tudor Caravan park for a 4 nights shakedown trip.

No snow this time, but wet, cold and windy.  Again we spent time walking the towpath and availing ourselves of the facilities in the adjacent premises.  We were also joined by Beastie for a few nights - she also brought her parents.

A heatwave arrived at Easter and on April 18th we are pulling in through the gates of the Stover site near Newton Abbot for a planned stay of 4 nights.  In the sunshine we had a day out up on Dartmoor and a trip over the Tamar into east Cornwall.

Our stay was cut short though, as a phone call home on the Sunday morning reveals that Creaky has been taken into hospital and we head for home just as soon as we can pull down the canopy and hitch up.

May Day weekend was approaching, and we had planned a trip to Longleat.  That changed rather abruptly though as Creaky was once again rushed into hospital in the days leading up to our departure.  we've both got leave booked from work, so luckily I manage to secure a pitch for 6 nights at a very local Pembrey Country Park.  We're away, but close enough for Herself to visit hospital every day.

The weather was quite kind to us and we spent lots of time walking the dogs and chilling by the van, also taking in a war festival over the weekend.

We didn't go away for the Spring bank holiday due to us attending a Madness gig over the weekend.  We did have 6 nights away in the week following at Home Farm near Weston Super Mare.  A superb and peaceful CL was a real tonic.

We spend a lot of time walking on the beach at Sandy Bay, but also manged days out to Brean, Wells, Cheddar, Glastonbury and Minehead.

After having some warrantee work done on the van, an impromptu weekend is had at Pembrey Country Park on June 20th, where we pitch next to Ronnie, MBW and Beastie for 3 nights on one of the hottest weekends of the year so far.

The start of July sees us setting off on our early summer holiday.  The first stage was 5 nights at Exebridge Lakeside.  The weather was great and as well as various walks we took in The Valley of the Rocks and the Tarr Steps.

We also spent a lot of time in the beer garden of the nearby Anchor Inn.

Straight from here we headed towards Lyme Regis for 3 nights stopping at Manor Farm CS.  We had a great few days, but the main reason was to attend the annual Sausages n Cider Festival, hosted by the local football club.

From then it seemed like an eternity to our main summer break, our annual pilgrimage to the far west of Cornwall for 18 nights, starting at August 22nd.  Trevedra Farm didn't disappoint, but then it never does.  It's our spiritual home.

No October getaway this year, but the start of November sees us hitching up once more for a two stop trip away.  Firstly we pitch up for 2 nights at Parc Bryn Bach in the pouring rain to attend a nearby birthday party.

The Sunday, with very nasty hangovers, sees us towing down to the New Forest, where we pitched up at Black Knowl for another 6 nights.  We spent a lot of time walking in the forest, and didn't really venture far.  The weather was mostly kind to us and we had a fabulous week.

And there we have it.  Two further trips in December were cancelled.  At the start of the month a 3 night shopping trip in The Cotswolds was ditched due to me needing emergency dental surgery that weekend, with a dismal weather forecast for the time between Christmas and New Year extinguishing any enthusiasm we had for a 4 night trip to Longleat.

Happy New Year everyone, and safe travels.

Blue and Pink Jobs

Right then, before I start I have to fess up that I've stolen the idea for this blog post from an imaginary friend on the Internet who's superb blog can be read HERE.

Tinternet, and especially groups on The Book, is full of discussion on what constitutes pink and blue jobs when away in the caravan.  I've previously touched on this in a blog post back October 2012 (CLICK HERE) , when I said ......

 When we are away, Herself and I tend to share the duties equally.

 She tends to be 50% cook, washer upper, laundry lady, reversing aid, left wing mirror authenticator,  sweeper of the floor, bed maker upper, financier, site booker inner, fridge switch operator,  roof vent checker, medical advisor, Health & Safety representative, highway code enforcer, speed trap detector, profanity censor, blind operator, water empty alarm, “bog full” announcer, dietary advisor, disc jockey, meteorologist, and three night conjugal event co-ordinator.

 Of course, everything else as usual is down to me, and rather than bore you with a long list, suffice to say I drive.  I am also put in charge of anything that in effluent related.

This hardly does the topic justice though, so I knocked up the following table.  It is obviously composed from my perspective and makes a big issue of everything I do while at the same time completely ignoring a multitude of tasks that herself does that I didn't know she does, or even that they needed doing!

So if you see a fat, bald Welsh bloke with two black eyes emptying the waste on your next site, you'll know that Herself has read this post and explained to me in no uncertain terms the error of my ways!!

Anyway, the chart ........

Where we go is always down to me.  Herself take s no interest in this, to the point that even 2 days before we set off her response to work colleagues when asked where she is going this time on holidays is always a shrug of the shoulders.

Towing duties are down to me, Herself can tow and has done in the past when we towed a much smaller 15ft Avondale Pearl Custom, but since our vans have gone past 7m she's not towed on the public highway.

Seeing that Herself also has no interest in where we are heading, the navigation is also down to me ..... This of course may also be due to me ranting at her in the past when she's unwittingly sent me down a dead end or something.

I'm deaf, so always leave Herself to check in and have the lecture off the site wardens, and I just circle the site (at least 3 times) until Herself had decided on a suitable pitch.  There are many factors to take into account here for Herself, but the practicalities of getting the van onto the chosen pitch and being able to get a TV signal are not on Herself's radar.

I'm shit at reversing and Herself won't touch the mover remote so getting the van off the back of the car and onto the pitch is down to me, but to be fair she will jump into the driver's seat just as soon as I've unhooked the breakaway cable, and parks up in the allocated spot once I precision pitched in line with the white peg (no dressing  down off those pesky wardens).

I have toys, so pitching the van and getting it level is my job, and I will not give up that pleasure to anyone.  I make it look as complicated as possible but to be brutally honest the combination of a Pitch Perfect, Lock 'n' Level, cordless tyre inflator, cordless drill and a pair of Nemesis wheel locks makes the task a doddle.

No doubt though, if Tyre inflation of the Lock 'n' Level was via a foot pump, Herself's assistance would be required as I wouldn't be able to fully concentrate on looking out for those magic two lights while at the same time pumping away and pulling calf muscles.

By now Herself has generally escaped the wind and rain just as I'm winding down the last leg.  She inside and is hurling stuff out of the door in my general direction.  Well it can be no accident that most of it hits me!  Services are connected by me outside while she sets about converting inside from travelling mode into a habitable space.  This used to be a big deal, but in reality is much easier now it's just the two of us travelling.  When the boys travelled with us you couldn't step inside the van for crap that covered the entire floor!

Awning / canopy next. If just the canopy I manage that by myself while Herself trots off to inform the wardens what pitch we are on and collect any security fobs needed.  She never used to, but we've had too many near misses with pegs flying through the air over the years and she feels safer out of the firing zone.

The Vango is a 2 person job, and with the appropriate risk assessments in place I am honoured to have her assistance which really only includes holding onto things that need holding onto and following me round with the peg bag!

Awning furniture is her department while I plug in the extension lead and set up any lights.

To complete the set up The TV needs to be tuned and our IT set up.  Again this involves toys so I am responsible.  TV is a priority as this will keep Herself happy, so an app is fired up on my phone to find the nearest transmitter, the compass app is fired up to make sure the status in pointing in the right direction and the TVs are prodded into doing their thing.

When we're on site any cooking is shared evenly, when I say shared what i really mean is anything exciting like using a BBQ or a griddle is bagsied by me while Herself gets to hold onto the more mundane stuff that involves using the cooker.  The one task that we do share evenly is the washing up, though to be honest as we have a dish washer at home I find it a bit of a novelty.

Keeping things empty that should be empty and keeping things full that should be full is my department.  Herself did empty the toilet once, but it is an experience she's not too keen to repeat!

I can't stand being in a dirty caravan with dirty windows so all outside cleaning is initiated by me, but to be fair to Herself she always makes the bed and spruces up the inside to her much higher standards than mine!

I don't know how to work our washing machine at home, so when away a trip down to the laundry room when required is a bit of a novelty for me, though my incompetence sometimes infuriates any assistants working there!

Breaking camp is a depressing process.  We tend to just get up and do it, with very little social interaction.  It can be simply split.  I do outside and Herself does inside, but she does watch over me when hitching up to correct any "senior moments".

I'm usually on my chin straps when we get home, and Herself has usually has a good kip as we eat up motorway miles, so once home she engages overdrive, with me just having to get the van back into its rather tight parking space and secure it from thieves.  Herself does most of the rest.

And there you have it.  Should have just left it as it was in 2012.